Sunday, December 11, 2011

Sunday, Mean Sunday: Guest Bedrooms For When You Hate Guests

Once, a long time ago, I made my stepmom a virtual guest bedroom. At the time I disliked my stepmother and the room was pretty clown heavy. She doesn't like clowns. I have given up on disliking my stepmother alone and have expanded into disliking anyone who would overstay their welcome in my home. I'm sure you will soon be seeing my work on HGTV.

I picked this bed because not only is it beautiful to look at, it is also quite uncomfortable to sleep on. Although it could be made bearable if an air mattress was thrown over it. The air mattress would detract from its beauty a lot and reduce its uncomfortablitly not even a little. Seriously, air mattresses are a piece of crap. I'd rather sleep on the hardwood floor. Or the hardwood bed. Whichever.

This table will work out well. It's not much to look at but can be hard on your knees. Why would you need a table as a guest in my house anyway? It's not like your staying long enough to not beat any letter you write home. So here's the absolute minimum I can think of to do tablewise.

If there is a table I guess there gotta be a chair. Happy sitting.

Happy sitting at the minimalist table in the chair with chair legs as a cushion writing by the light of this lamp! Nothing but good thoughts, y'all!

Love these sconces. Flanking the bed would be nice. And the table lamp. Wouldn't that look wonderful paired with Old Hangy on either side of the table? Too bad there's no mini-chandelier with blood red crystals dripping off of it to hang off the ceiling.

As a former smoker, I know that ashtrays are indispensable. A couple of these strewn around and anyone can pleasure themselves with smokes any time they want.

And what room would be complete without art? I've got two top picks. This one is very room specific:

But this one is all-round perfect. Especially right across from the bed so it's the last thing you see before you fall asleep:


  1. I didn't know you were opening a B & B! Good luck :)

  2. It would be called Can't Stand To See You Inn