You'd Think I'd Be More On Top Of Things

Every week day I release two new pieces in PinkSlinkie's Etsy (one each on Saturday and Sunday). I also like to have at least 5 days of stuff waiting to be released. That means I should have. . . give me a minute, math isn't my strong point. . . times six. . . carry the one. . . cosin of 45 degrees. . . 12 drafts of pieces at the ready. As of this moment I have 2.

This is because I have fallen way behind on picture taking. So today, instead of my usual insightful, Pultzer level entry, I give you:

Five Movie Titles That Could Be About Pooping
1. The Andromeda Strain
2. Black Snake Moan
3. Brokeback Mountain
4. The Hot Rock
5. I Am Number Four



Now off to take about 100 pictures.

I Hate Flash: A Mixed Media Presentation

Having a bad picture of your wares is worse than having no picture at all. This is why flash photos of jewelry irk me. Imagine if I tell you I made a pair of mixed media earrings. They're square, largish with mosaic glass tiles and 20 gauge silver wire. Well, no need to imagine me telling you that because I did make such a pair of earrings. And tell you I did.

Without a picture who knows what fantastical, behemoth glass and wire concoction a body would dream up. Maybe even a lot better than the pair I've actually made. Maybe (or most likely) they'll not have any idea of what the hell I'm talking about. Either of these scenarios is better than a flash photo of said earrings.

Now comes the part of the entry where I show you a flash photo of those mixed media earrings to illustrate my point. But if I do that, the ugly flash photo will be the thumbprint photo of this entry and I'd rather eat the glass earrings than have that happen. Instead, here's a side by side comparison of two photos. The only difference between the two is one was taken with the flash on and one with the flash turned off:

We can all agree on one thing: these photos are not side by side.

















Typically, if I were presenting this picture of my jewelry, I'd tweak the lighting, work on the focus, change the angle and fiddle endlessly to get the best picture I could. But just NOT using flash improved the shot exponentially.

P.S. The other side of the earrings have the same mosaic glass pattern. In between-- cardboard painted black.

Tutorial Too. With Words That Don't Make Sense

If there are two things I've learned in the vast amount of knowledge I've gathered lo these 8 days of blogging, is that people like fireworks and tutorials (another thing I learned is that obsessively checking your stats does nothing to improve them). So I've combined them both into a super, colossal, two, two, two mints in one blog post-- a tutorial on how to make firework earrings.

These, to be exact.



There is a code to this tutorial. A cool kid code that only I know right now. But you'll be a cool kid too, after you read the Firework Earrings ingredient list.


Eight 4 or 5 inch long 24 gauge wire
Six 4 or 5 inch long 20 gauge wire
Two 10 inch long 18 gauge wire
beads
ear wire (the ones I used are handmade but you can put in any kind you like)

Mind you, I shot this tutorial at about 2 in the morning, in bed and one-handed which explains the crappy pictures. And by 'one-handed' I mean one hand on the camera the other holding the piece. And by 'holding the piece' I mean holding the earring. Perv.



Damnit! I keep forgetting to beg people to visit my Etsy shop.

Happy Independance Day!

Before I eat myself into a meat coma, I've come here to wish all 6 of my faithful readers great grilling. You are grilling today, aren't you? It's the law. If you don't grill or at least picnic on the 4th of July

Remember, we have the greatest political system in all of the world-- even Canada. I've got the proof coming straight out of our politician's mouths.


What right does Congress have to go around making laws just because they deem it necessary? -- Marion Barry


Take your fucking tampon out and tell me what you have to say. -- Rahm Emanuel



Capital punishment is our way of demonstrating the sanctity of life. -- Orrin Hatch



I think gay marriage is something that should be between a man and a woman. -- Arnold Schwartzenegger


The issue of economics is not something I've understood as well as I should. -- John McCain



More and more of our imports come from overseas. -- George W Bush



They don't call me Tyrannosaurus Sex for nothing. -- Ted Kennedy


Many of them are so dumb they could throw themselves at the ground and miss. -- James Traficant



From my Etsy here in New York, Happy 4th!

Hey, being unemployed calls for MORE beer, not less

If there is one thing that I enjoy as much as I enjoy making jewelry and crafting in general is drinking beer. I'd be drinking beer right now if it wasn't 9:30 in the morning. Sure, this raspberry and cranberry juice I'm sipping is nice and all but a cranberry lambic would be even better. O.K., that lambic sentence is a lie. I don't like fruity beer. I don't even like citrus in my beer. I like my beer to taste very strongly of beer. Call me crazy.

Now that have been cut down to just a 3 income family (this is New York, you need at least 5 jobs to live in the fashion I would like to become accustomed to) some things gotta give. Since I cannot convince my family to do without electricity, gas or cable, the beer has to go. No more combining my two favorite things: beer and jewelry making.

Which reminds me of an episode of A Different World. It was after Lisa Bonet left to have her period all over Mickey Rourke, so the main character was Freddie. Freddie figured out that she could write a whole lot better after she had a few drinks. Convinced that alcohol is her muse, she gets fall down drunk and writes only to find that once she's sober, her drunk writing makes no sense.

There was so much wrong with that little morality play bought to us by Bill Cosby. For one thing: don't get fall down drunk. If you are so drunk that you can't speak, how in the hell are you going to write? For another thing: Sinbad is funny, damn it!

I have proof that you can be drunk and creative. My husband and I went to a black tie ball held at The Prospect Park Carousel. Hubby was driving and drinks were free. Inspired by all the rich people in tuxedos and high heel shoes stumbling about on the grass and a river of free drinks, I came home and made this:

The only problem with these drunk earrings that I can see is that I only made one before I fell asleep making these truly one of a kind earrings.


Whoa, look at the time. It's practically 11:30 now. Another hour or so and it beer won't seem anywhere near as unseemly! So have a beer and check out my Etsy.

Random List of Things That Bother Me

Pictures of jewelry using flash.

Wire poking a hole in my thumb.

Wire poking a hole in my foot when I step out of bed.

The way my cat has to lay directly on top of whatever it is I'm reading at the moment.

The inability of a kitchen to stay clean for more than 10 minutes no matter how much time and attention devoted to scrubbing and cleaning it.

The idea that the conservation of information my not hold true. Damn you Stephan Hawking!

The price of turquoise.

Chewie doesn't get a medal. WTF Leia? I call racism.




Totally unrelated to my random list-- I have learned it is bad form to mention Katy Perry's Hershey Kiss Tits without some sort of visual marker. So here:

Almost forgot: Look at my Etsy shop! LOOK AT IT!!!

The last 5 places I hobby shopped.

I’m not a normal girl. I don’t like shopping. Not for clothes, not for shoes, not for sales. I don’t want to hang around a store for forever touching things, talking about the things I may or may not buy. All that looking and touching and blah-blah-blahing and spending five hours at the Roosevelt Field Mall dashing hither and yon without buying a damn thing-ing is not for me.

Except when it’s on line. I can on line shop for hours and hours, especially if it's for jewelry stuff. Gemstones are dazzling, metal melts my heart and finding findings fulfills me. So here, in case any one was wondering, are the last five places I shopped on line for jewelry supplies.



Mountain Fire Gems
The go-to, fall-back, first stop and re-visit just in case place.


Wire-Sculpture
A great place to get that hard to find wire your kids have been begging for this Christmas.


Rings 'n Things
Come here to get rings. . . and things.


Buddist Mala
I was fulfilling a request for a Mala bracelet. Finding guru beads isn't easy.



Fusion Beads
Think of a finding you want then go to Fusion Beads. If they don't have it, find a way to fabricate it yourself.


Lastly, a shout out to the meatworld fleshy store Ace Handicraft located here in lovely West Hempstead, Long Island (West Hempstead's motto: far enough away from Hempstead to avoid their cooties). Don't you dare say anything about their website as I'm sure it was handi-crafted by one of the lovely and talented staff.




If you'd like to see what I do with the crap I buy, come visit my Etsy shop.